Cardiologist

So I went to see Dr Sherm Sorensen the Cardiologist....kind of a weird Duck. he didn't like me saying I was getting old when He's probably older than my dad. I had a Transcranial Doppler done. They put two dopplers on my temples where the arteries that go to my brain are. When she put it on it was a faint heartbeat sound. She put the IV in...one the first try might I add. That doesn't happen that often to me. She then injected aggitated saline(bubbles) into my veins and almost immediately you heard the bubble on the doppler. In a heart without a hole they would get filtered through the lungs and back through the heart before going to the brain. Well the hole in my heart allowed them to go immediately to my brain. The test ranges the amount of bubble from 0(meaning none) to a 5, and then a 5+. Well at resting mine was a 4. When I applied pressure I was a 5+. He also said I have a septic Aneurysm which can collect clots and send them the wrong way. So I have three things against me. Spots on my brain, the 4 & 5+ reading and the aneurysm I have a really high risk for a Stroke. He suggested surgery to close the hole with an artificial something or other :) He will go through my femoral artery and insert the mesh device and it will close the hole off and my heart tissue will grow over it and hold it into place. There is a 99% success rate with this surgery. It's only one night in the hospital and back to mostly normal duties in 2 days. No lifting heavy things for a month or strenuous exercise (not a problem as it hurts to bad to do strenuous exercies). Anyways that's the story for now. I have the surgery scheduled May 27th. Then I follow up with the neurologist a week later to go over the rest of the results and see if they ruled out MS or not. As the Cardiologist said this problem doesn' t rule out MS. It just prevents strokes from the PFO. So the neurologist knows in the future if I continue to have problems that it's not the PFO. I hope this all makes sense!!! Lets hope it's all the PFO.

Echo.........

So I had an echocardiogram today. Well what do ya know....I have a hole in my heart. I have a PFO. It's a hole you have as a baby that usually closes but mine didn't. Now off for more heart tests and to meet with the cardiologist to get the plan of attack to make sure it quits attacking my head. I am SSSOOOO done with headaches.....hopefully this means no more steroid injections....that is nasty stuff!

Dr Update

So I went to my first Neurology appointment on Monday thanks to sweet Angel for getting me an appointment ASAP. The anticipation is killing me...knowing your brain is getting damaged and don't know why. So he looked at my MRI's and he said there are spots on my MRI that are typical placing of MS lesions but that the MRI doesn't show for sure if it's demylenating lesions or if it's from some type fo vascular problems(small clots or strokes or whatever) So now the testing starts to figure out what it is. I started monday with Steriod infusions for two days. It did a number on me but has helped in some areas. It did make my headaches more massive and painful but it's a side effect of the drug. I had rapid heartbeat at points in the night with 110 beats per minute. I got flush for hours and still am. But I have had some relief in pain and stiffness. He said if this relieves some symptoms it means that it might be autoimmune like MS or Lupus or something because it will take down the inflammation and pain caused by those in the brain and spinal column. Second I had about 10 vials of blood or so (I think it was more) taken for all kinds of tests. I have some of them back on my dr's webpage he has for me but I can't tell what all of them mean with the medical gibber gabber. So I will have to wait for the dumbed down version from my dr! But all the autoimmune, kidney,liver and lupus ones are higher than normal. I will have to have and EKG with bubble this thursday to rule out a hole in my heart that could be sending clots to my brain. Right now they are just ruling out things and trying to find out what could cause all my pain, fatigue, headaches, miscarriage, my left eye having problems, muscle twitching etc! He did show in my appointment that my left hand was weaker and had drifting left eye, and i saw double at one point out of my left eye. Which is where the majority of my headaches are. I am also realizing I can't concentrate. Remember things as well and I can't remember even some of my close friends names. So don't be offended if I all the sudden can't remember your name. I know you just can't pull your name out! He said that alot of times after someone has a kid or the hormones from a pregnancy loss could make a flare up in an autoimmue disease and that's why I could have had more problems since the miscarriage. So we will see......only time and tests will tell. I hope this is the beginning of some relief and not the beginning of worse things to come! We are doing good. We are grateful for all the outpouring of love and support. Life gives us challenges, but the lord knows we can handle all that he gives us so we will handle all of this! We know we aren't the only ones that struggle.

Pondering (warning long emotional post)

These last couple of months for me have been a humbling experience. I have been pondering a lot about my support system I have. Lets start with my family. I was lucky enough to be born to my parents. I do indeed have the best parents in the whole world. They serve me everyday and never ask for anything in return. The tend my kids EVERYDAY I am at work. They do special errands for me as I can't do everything because I work full time. They are loving and supportive and are wonderful people who serve their family and community.

My Husband....what did I EVER do to deserve such a wonderful man! Words can't describe how awesome he is. With all the pain and sickness I have had in the 5 years we have been married he sure has stepped up to the plate. Not once has he ever blamed me for being lazy(which I blame myself all the time) not once has he told me to help him when I am just watching him because I am so fatigued or hurt to bad to help. This is the list of things he does for me. He does the Laundry, all the yard work, Cleans, takes care of the kids, does dishes, grocery shopping, and many more things. You ask what do I do? Not much. I pretty much do the little cooking we do and sometimes dishes but he takes care of the rest. He picks up all the slack without complaining or degrading me. Which I probably wouldn't give him the same respect. He loves me and his family...all his family and would do anything for any of them. Not only does he do this for me....but he finds time to help my parents, and syblings out. He finds time to help our neighbors with their projects. He is the definition of Service. Each day I spend with this man I fall more in love with him. What a blessing he is in my life.

My sister......not only did I get the best parents I got the best sisters too. She has stepped up to the plate for me too. Since we work 10 hour days and are required to and since we only have about 1 1/2 hours with our boys before they have to go to bed because we drag them out of bed at 5:55 or so to go to grandmas......well any who. We didn't want to spend that time cooking and cleaning up dinner........so what does she do she says. Well have something in mind or something ready and she will cook us dinner each night and stop on the way home from work and do that for us. She exercises during that time to on our WII. So now we come home and dinner is on the table. What a selfless thing to do! Did I tell you I love my family! She is like another member of our family at our house. She does so much for me. She will tend my kids anytime for free. She takes my kids on auntie nephew dates. She is so awesome. She pushes me to exercise even though its painful. Which I need. She makes me want to be a better person.

My neighbors & friends......how lucky I am to have such wonderful friends to live by. They are just neighbors they are friends and some I would consider family. I am somewhat of a social butterfly...I am shy but I love having friends over for social events. I love just being able to walk out the front door and be able to know I can find someone to talk too and know that they care about me as much as I do them. They bring so much joy in our family and I know I can count on them for anything and I hope they feel the same for us. I love our monthly dinners we have with a couple of our friends. We have done it for 5 years and look forward to it every month. The are such a blessing in our life! We love them so much! I am grateful for Janae...for comforting me through my break down at church and crying with me even though she didn't know what can of worms she was opening. The sincernest in her eyes comforted me! I think all those former neighbors and friends I grew up with know that they have effected me all in such a way to mold me to the person I am today! I am grateful for each one of them.

My coworkers..........ok Well two of them...they know who they are. I can count on them for anything! Did you hear me anything. Even though I spend 40 hours a week with them they aren't sick of me. I can talk to them about anything. Any question I am to embarrsed to ask anyone else................I ask them. They will explain to this sheltered girl! They would do anything for me and I love them and I am grateful for them each day!


Unexpected friends.....Every friday Tim or I (it's my job to do but tim fills in when I can't) one of us goes to Charlie's house to help this little sweet angel try to regain some function in his sweet little body after having bacterial menegitis. We go and with a couple of other people at a session help him crawl and learn sensation and sound and sight again. We started in November I think it was of 2009. I know from us serving this sweet family that we have been blessed. How do I know Charlie. Well Charlie's mom Angel(the name is fitting) grew up close to us back in childhood days at one point we were in the same ward. Well she is my brothers age and her and her husband Rob are friends with my brother. Also when they got married they moved in the duplex across the street from my parents so I lived by them for a while. I was heart broken about Charlie for them. When the opprotunity came for me to be able to help them. I didn't hesitate. I always think what if I needed help? How could I not help someone in need. Once I found out I had the problems with demylenation I had my dad call a neurologist while I was in disneyland and make me an appointment for me. Well at my last Therapy session with Charlie I asked Rob about Angel's job(my dad had mentioned he thought she worked for a neurologist) He said she did but it's strickly and MS clinic. We talked about things for a minute and immediatley he said I am going to ask Angel if they take your insurance and see what we can do about getting you in ASAP! He looked at me and told me that his heart hurt for me. I never in a million years thought one of my brothers friends would ever feel that way for me! I always felt like the stupid little younger sister with his friends. Angel and Rob have never treated me that way. Angel is working right now with her Doctor to get me into him as soon as possible even though he only works 9 days in the next two months. I even remember when I was still single and struggling with loneliness and stuff I was outside my parents house and Rob and Angel, my brother and a bunch of their friends were going to dinner. Angel invited me. There was no way in heck I was going to hang out with my brothers friends. I was never accepted there. I declined. But Angel being the sweetest person ever INSISTED I come and join them. I went and it was just what I needed at that time. Being accepted somewhere were I never dreamed I would be accepted. It was wonderful. In a small way it changed a perspective in my life. Also when I help with Charlie another one of my Brothers friends helps at the same time as me Troy. What an awesome guy he is! He talks to me and actually cares too about me! I guess I have never been accepted in that part of my Brothers life.....so to me it's shocking. I guess these weren't the guys that hung out at our house when growing up. But I wish they would have been the ones!!! I am glad that now I get to see them once a week and chat! They are funny too. I am sorry about getting on the Brother band wagon but apparently I have some brother issues. Don't get me wrong I still love him. I guess we have just never grown out of the sybling rivalry/ older cool brother vs younger sister that he thought was annoying. Maybe by the time I am 70 we will be over that.

I am grateful for all the people in my life that have influenced me for the good. Even if you weren't mentioned I hope you know the impact you have made on my life and I am grateful for you. Even though I have struggled physically and been sick for a long time I am grateful for all that I have and I just wanted to share it with the WWW :)